Don't Be Like the Living Dead
Be happy at work. Have you ever gone into a civil service building and noticed the employees? They are the living dead! Yesterday, I went downtown to file my fictitious business name statement and I couldn't believe the cows at the windows. They all acted as though they had knives stuck in their backs! They spoke in a monotone and never showed any emotion. It was chilling! I thought that I had entered the twilight zone!
Be a rhinoceros and show your personality. Smile and act as if you are alive. Put some spring in your step and some warmth in your handshake. Put some feeling behind your words and show an eagerness to help. You will not only like yourself much more, but you will create a warmer, friendlier, more productive work environment and everyone will love you for that, especially the boss.
If you want more from your job, show up tomorrow as a full time rhinoceros. Don't worry about the rumors that you have been drinking or that you dropped our of bed on your head. Remember your two inch thick skin and your audacity.
Cows hat to work with rhinos because rhinos make them look bad. Cows are lazy and unproductive. They will try to pull you down to their level. Don't let them. There is a loose rhinoceros in the place now! Watch out! There's no telling what will happen! One rhinoceros can really wake a place up. Decide to be that rhino and watch good things start to happen to you.
-from Rhinoceros Success, by Scott Alexander